10. Australia - Melbourne and perchance to Stratford

Covering 19 to 24 October 2019

so much for Betty's in York

one of the fine old shopping arcades

All I knew about Melbourne before we arrived was that it had held the first southern hemisphere Olympics back in 1956.  I thought it was a strangely old-fashioned sort of place but that decided on solely by the extensive knowledge I absorbed in about a three day visit.  Walking to the tram stop through a suburban area, it was like walking through the 1970s in England, based on the way people had their gardens planted up.  To our surprise the area near our campsite in the Melbourne suburbs had a set of photographic themed road names.    We saw a Snapshot Drive and a Portrait Road amongst others but no Motor Drive or Overexposed Crescent.  It seemed very odd.  As we travelled into the centre, the various shopping areas we went through just reinforced that view of ‘old fashioned’. 

The excellent tram system runs along the centre of the road or sometimes along a dedicated central reservation between two carriageways.  In the more urban areas traffic stops when the tram does because passengers have to walk across the road when they get on and off.  There is also what seemed to be a very odd right turn involved for a car on a tram route.  Remember, the Australians drive on the left.  The car in question drives into the junction and then stops as far over to the left as it can.  When the right turn is clear of tram or other traffic it then makes the turn.  If said car sits in the centre as we would, it either blocks the tram (v v poor form in Melbourne) or if it sits slightly to the left of the tram line it blocks all the other traffic.  It sounds complicated and actually I think it is but I suppose it must work for Melburnians (as they are apparently known).  Fortunately when we left Melbourne, we drove right through the city and managed to avoid all right turns across tram routes.

the finest piece of street art we saw in Melbourne

The centre of the city itself was very much like any high rise Aussie city centre with a decent number of Victorian and early 20^th Century buildings overshadowed by their concrete and glass neighbours.  They’ve also managed to keep and maintain a number of old shopping arcades just like Adelaide has.  To the north of the city centre is a very impressive covered market which we visited on a Sunday.  A hugely varied amount of food was on offer as well as the non-food market with a lot more than just clothes on sale. 

Kookaburra aka The Laughing Jackass

Melbourne has a really excellent and well established Botanical Garden set on rolling ground sloping towards the main river, the Yarra.  One sign by a gatehouse explains that it gave protection for the gardens from “unprincipled larrikins”.  What I particularly wanted to see in these gardens were the English Elms, those virtually wiped by Dutch Elm Disease in the 1970s in Britain.  I wasn’t interested enough in wildlife at that time to ever remember seeing fully grown Elms.  Well I did see them although they weren’t yet fully in leaf.

When we left we headed south from Melbourne onto the Mornington Peninsula before we headed east, if not hugging the coast at least keeping on fairly friendly terms with it.  Some of you might remember the Australian Prime Minister, Harold Holt disappearing during a swim in the sea.  For those who remember, it was as long ago as 1967 !  The “swim that needs no towel” as Bill Bryson memorably put it was on the Mornington Peninsula and the Aussies opened a memorial to their ex-PM near Melbourne.  In what must be either appalling bad taste but more likely Australian humour, it’s The Harold Holt Memorial Swimming Centre.

another piece of Aussie humour perhaps, or is it an insult ?

Wilson's Promontory in the distance

enjoying a fly-free cuppa

At the side of a number of roads we had noticed piles of what we took to be litter, a very unusual sight in Australia and then we realised that it was a bit more systematic than just litter.  So I asked a local.  I don’t know if it is just the State of Victoria or Australia wide but twice a year they have a hard waste collection.  ‘Hard’ in this context means white goods, metal, glass and rubble and a householder just leaves it all (and some are huge piles) on the roadside outside their property.  The local council collect it free of charge, the cost being covered in the local property taxes.  I think this is a brilliant idea.  You’d almost have to be mentally unbalanced to drive away and dump stuff when it’s just collected from your house.  Having to pay extra to have it removed or driving to a dump and having to pay just to dump some items as we do in England strikes me as an encouragement for some people to fly-tip.

we rather like these corrugated iron roofed cottages

a little bit of 90 Mile Beach

At the eastern end of a magnificent sandy strip called Ninety Mile Beach a number of lakes and rivers finally break through to the sea.  The view from the road high above the town at the river/sea junction is simply wonderful.  Various shades of blue water stretch way off to our right separated from the sea by golden sand with vegetation helping to bind it together.  Sandy islands enhance the view still further.  At the narrow entrance to the sea, various ships sat at anchor on the edge of the town.  Mind you, whoever named the place had clearly left all their imagination brain cells at home for the day.  The town has the completely underwhelming name of Lakes Entrance.

the lake's entrance at Lakes Entrance

one of the busier parts of the main street in Stratford

We’d passed through a nondescript little place a little inland called Stratford and wouldn’t you just know that it lies on the River Avon.  For some years now and to no great surprise it’s held a Shakespeare on the River Festival featuring Shakespeare plays (natch) and modern Australian plays.  We thought of a few Aussie themed Shakespeare adaptations.  So for your delectation we present The Taming of the Roo, Two Mates of Verona, Bruce and Juliet, A Midsummer Night’s Dreamtime and All’s Well That Ends Well which has been renamed No Worries.  Very happy to have any other suggestions from you.

the top secret Australian Marine Squadron on parade